You ever try to feel good, despite the fact that there’s a lot of crazy, unnerving stuff going on around you?

In the past whenever my day was hurling towards ‘awful’ I always tried to eek out a “You can do this…“ or a “I am strong enough to handle it.” Sometimes it’s a bulging eyed, “Breathe, breathe, breathe!”

But you know what – (and I’ve never told anyone this before) – after all these years of putting on my affirmation game face, I’ve come to a “let’s-cut-the-shit” realization. Most affirmations are crap. Yeah, I said it. Need a synonym? Here’s one, do-do. Here’s another, ca-ca. And I’ll tell you why.

For many years I told myself that I’m a millionaire. I affirmed the heck out of it. I affirmed it with feeling, with gratitude, with imagination, with emotional whip cream and a cherry on top. I hung affirmations on my wall. I hung affirmations on the bathroom mirror. I had them flashing on my computer screen a la subliminal messages style.

And affirm as I might, I’m still not a millionaire. I’m more than a tenth of the way there, which is pretty darn cushy. But let’s face it, one-tenth cushy still ain’t millionaire cushy.

Are affirmations really to blame for my lack?

The mind believes whatever you tell it. It will take all of your collected experience and spit it out to create your reality.

Affirmations, as they’re currently taught, are like crutches for a man who walks perfectly fine. You tell yourself a blatant untruth in hopes that you’ll move towards that untruth, so that it’ll eventually become a genuine truth.

But here’s what I think… I have a sneaking suspicion that the mind doesn’t quite work that way. I’m thinking it’s more like the mind believes whatever the heck you tell it, as it applies to the right now, here, today.

For example, if I’m lazy and I sit on my rump all day, telling myself that I’m productive just reinforces that I’m productive in my laziness. Likewise if I tell myself that I’m a millionaire 20 times a day, I’m just reinforcing that my $150K a year IS millionaire status. “I’m skinny,” becomes “skinny” even if you’re 300 pounds. And there you are sitting “skinny” wondering why you’re not losing any weight.

The mind compares whatever you have to whatever you’re saying to yourself, and makes that connection. In my logical mind I know what a million dollars is. I know that I don’t have a million dollars. But in my emotional mind, I’m counting the money I have and I’m telling myself, “I’m a millionaire! Yippee!”

Affirmations done right

I’ve stopped affirming that I’m a millionaire. Until I reach millionaire status there will be no more of that.

Instead I’ve started living and affirming my truth. I’m a self-employed entrepreneur. I’m moving towards millionaire status. I’m waking up in the morning and I’m moving towards millionaire status. I see my end destination. And I know that I have to listen to spirit and take action to get there.

Sure it’s boring. Sure it’s uneventful.

The affirmation lover in you might argue, “But if you constantly tell yourself that you’re moving towards something, you’ll constantly be moving towards it.”

Not true. If I tell myself that I’m moving towards something, I’m going to keep moving towards it until I reach it. That million dollars is a finite tangible goal.

As long as I’m telling myself that I’m moving towards it, my subconscious will move towards it. Whereas if I tell myself that I’m there, my subconscious says, “Whew, break out the champagne. We’re done!”

See the difference?

I’m curious to know what your affirmation opinions are. Share them with me.

The alarm goes off at 4am for me. At the end of the day, my head doesn’t hit the pillow until 10pm. And in between those times my day morphs into a neverending story.

I used to become overwhelmed very easily. But nowadays I’m fairly even keeled most of the time.

Situations that would have most people putting up streamers for a pity party, don’t even make me bat an eyelash. And that’s because when I feel insanity wrapping its arms around me, I fight back by giving…

There are few things that help me instantly change a negative mental state. Giving the Universe thanks for all the many blessings I have in my life is that survival mechanism for me.

I give thanks that I’m healthy. That I have a great apartment in the heart of the city. That no matter where I go in the world, I continue to meet great people. That my daughter really and truly loves me. Because I’m able to work at home. Because the older I get, the wiser I become. Because I’ve got warm, comfortable boots.

You name it – I give thanks for it.

And you know what?

Giving thanks – especially when you’re feeling stressed – grounds you. It gives you energy and strength. It’s a reminder that regardless of the momentary glitches, life really is good.

So today I want you to have a day of thanks. For every good thing that you see, give thanks for it. Give thanks for every morsel that you put into your mouth, and for the clothes on your back.

Even if you live in a breadbox, give thanks for your breadbox. For there are many who live in shacks and sleep on dirt floors.

Don’t get hung up on what’s wrong. Simply focus on the beauty of all that you have.

And don’t be surprised if you end up in a pool of joyous tears at the end of the day. You truly are blessed.

I’ve always considered myself to be fairly proficient at the art of creative visualization. I can definitely see myself living in a penthouse overlooking NYC’s Central Park. The early morning view is fantastic… I’m marveling at the same scenery as millionaires and billionaires like Donald Trump.

Does meditation enhance my visualization skills? For me – yes.

I’ve meditated on and off for several years. Though over the past 18 months I’ve made it a regular part of my everyday life. And I have to admit that my visualization skills have SIGNIFICANTLY improved in that time.

What I see in my mind now reminds me of a very clear, very vivid, 3D movie. For example, when I visualize myself working with a potential client, I can see the veins in their hand. I can feel the texture of their skin. I see age spots and acne and single gray hairs, as if they were standing in front of me.

I attribute this extreme clarity to meditation. However I also have to admit that meditation isn’t a cure all for every spiritual woe, or every spiritual person for that matter.

And just because I “see” more clearly as a result of meditating doesn’t mean you won’t be able to see clearly if you don’t meditate. Your source for clear visualizations may come in a completely different way.

The power of an open mind trumps meditation

Having an open mind means you understand the virtues of meditation. You realize that it could be a wonderful tool to use in your life. But you also know that if meditation doesn’t ring your bell, you can move on to something that does.

In other words, you can receive the same benefits of meditation doing something completely different. Why? Because the Universe speaks many different languages and the silence of meditation is just one language.

I hear the Universe talking to me when I write. I hear it when I’m getting my nails done. I hear it when I’m eating dinner at my favorite restaurant.

I see signs from the Universe all over the place. From bumper stickers to overheard conversations, the Universe doesn’t stop talking just because I’m finished meditating. On the contrary… it talks and teaches with and without meditation.

You are hereby sentenced to a lifetime of freedom!

I see a lot of people feeling unfocused (or even guilty) because they believe that meditation is the best way to connect to the Universe. And yet they don’t have the desire to end their ‘monkey mind chatter’ long enough to meditate.

If this rings true for you, then stop the madness right now. Remember the Universe speaks many languages – including Monkey Mind Chatter. (Aren’t you lucky!)

If you desire to engage in a two-way conversation with the Universe, all you have to do is be open to the experience. You don’t need meditation or some special ‘hopping-on-one-foot-while-lighting-a-blue-candle’ ritual.

Meditate because you want to meditate – not because you feel like it’s a requirement to reach a higher state of consciousness. Nothing will bring you closer to the Universe than what you feel brings you closer to the Universe.

And that’s the truth.

As microscopic as they are, fleas are truly some annoying little buggers. They dig into your skin, suck your blood, multiply like rabbits, and give you one ferocious itch.

But the mental fleas we unleash upon ourselves are even worse. They’re tiny, and yet they have the single-handed ability to keep us from living the life of our dreams.

If you recall from Monday’s post I told you about a ‘flea’ that one of my clients had. Her inner self had been giving her prompts to meditate more. Yet she was very afraid of the quiet. That seemingly insignificant fear turned into a flea. And that flea was sucking the life force out of her health and her relationships.

But I haven’t told you about MY flea yet…

I started writing professionally in my early 20’s. I was self-employed, single and very, very hungry for success.

I prospered, seeing the Law of Attraction give me almost everything that my minds eye had conceived. Within two months of starting out I was making almost $10K a month. I got my first publishing contract a year later, and had my first $20K day around four months after that.

My dream was to reach millionaire status before the age of 30, and I was well on my way to attaining that lofty goal.

And then I fell in love with a guy and we became inseparable.

Instead of co-mingling love and profits, I allowed my booming business to fall to the wayside. And fall it did, with a big, echoing THUD.

Those $20K days gave way to $3K months. But what hurt me the most was sitting on the sidelines and seeing the people who started in the business at the same time that I did, beginning to reach that coveted millionaire status I wanted so badly. And if that wasn’t enough, my hot and heavy relationship also ended.

That’s when my flea developed.

My flea came about because I decided to stay down-in-the-dumps. I humbly covered my light, crawled back to my little corner, and licked my wounds.

He knew I was unprotected and he dug in

Instead of jumping back into the business saddle, and brushing that little blood sucker off, I continued to wallow in my own self-pity.

Once again the Law of Attraction gave me everything that my minds eye conceived. Only this time instead of the big paydays and contract invitations, I got a teeter-totter lower middle class life. Sometimes things would be good, and sometimes they’d be less than good.

I knew I still had the ability to create a better life, but I continued to nurse the flea. It has only been within the past year and a half that I’ve begun to say NO MORE.

My flea represented one thing…

Embarrassment.

I allowed myself to become so engrossed in a relationship (which I knew wasn’t healthy for me) that I was willing to neglect my business. I allowed my clients and colleagues to see a very ugly part of me. The fact that I did that REALLY bothered me.

When the smoke cleared I was so embarrassed that I’d let all of this happen to my once thriving business I didn’t know what else to do except to hide myself. That single moment of shame changed my entire life for many, many years.

Looking for your flea

I’m beginning to see that almost everybody has one of these little fleas.

You may look at your life and see that your health is blah, or that your relationships are less than ideal. Perhaps your business is lying there like an unfinished puzzle.

Maybe you’ve attributed your woes to circumstances beyond your control. And some situations really can be blamed on somebody else.

Even still, I bet if you get your minds magnifying glass out, and look really closely, you’ll see a flea there. Some seemingly insignificant little glitch that took hold, and now has you itching like crazy.

Trust me when I say that he’s really, really small. And that’s why you’ve been able to secretly nurse this little fella for such a long time.

But I’m here to tell you that it’s time to flush his ass down the toilet once and for all. If you have the guts to face him, then you have the power to get rid of him and create a better life for yourself.

And that’s your assignment for this week – find your flea.

I don’t care whether you come to me for a reading, or close your eyes and meditate on it. The important thing is that you find him and get rid of him.

And when you’re done, get ready to feel lighter. Get ready to see and feel a healing take place. You’re going to know that you’re free.

As you may recall from my last post, I recently began channeling a nun. A nun who, upon our second session together, referred to me as a healer, and told me that my words would heal the people who needed to hear or read them.

Well there’s a reason why I believe she revealed this information to me. And that reason applies to almost everybody reading this blog.

Zen

The other day I was giving a reading to a woman who had a lot going on in her life. There were issues with relationships… issues with her health… issues with choosing a life path. Emotionally her energy felt all over the place.

I went about giving her information about these various issues in her life.

But I kept telling her that I felt like there was one itty-bitty issue that was stunting her growth. I intuitively saw it as a flea penetrating a small, open space in her armor. Once it got in it was making her itch – so to speak – in many parts of her life.

Midway into the reading I started seeing the word “Zen” in my mind. I saw symbols that to me represented the concept of Zen.

I stopped my client from talking and told her that I was getting a very important message. And then I told her, “It’s Zen.”

“To me,” I explained, “Zen basically represents a state of quiet mind.”

And with that she breathed a sigh of relief.

Silence was a concept that she’d been trying to embrace for a long time. Unfortunately her conscious mind kept telling her that it wasn’t necessary. So even though she felt like quieting her mind was important, she never truly put her heart in it.

My vision helped her see the flea that had gotten into her armor. And now she was prepared to handle it.

Your destiny is in the details

When I got off the call I thought about the smallness of her message, and the magnitude of its meaning to her.

It was very much like the nun telling me that I was a healer. Such a tiny piece of information – yet so dead on for my particular situation.

And that brings me full circle to what this means for your own life.

We often see change as requiring some kind of big, sweeping motion. But that’s not necessarily the way it has to be. I’m growing to see that the foundation for even the BIGGEST changes in our lives can be as simple as acknowledging a seemingly minor detail.

For my client it was “quiet.” For me it was “healing.” For you it might be “comfort” or even “exclusive.”

The point is, pay attention to what looks like the little details in your life. If you’re receiving a reading, don’t allow your mind to glaze over what you perceive as an insignificant point.

Spirit will often wrap the most shocking revelations in the teeniest of boxes.